Macau the homecoming.
August 7, 2012 | 11:09 PM
I didn't post this up when I first came back, but these are my memories and so they need to go up some time. Glad I finally have time to finish this now before the memories fade.
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Calvin was so epic the last night in Macau. I haven't laughed so much in the longest time. The conversation about his hotmail account and how he couldn't send pictures across email was just ridiculous I swear. Conversations through the night till the sun peeks through, especially in Macau where the sun rises especially early. Him inviting me to join him in his Harley tour of Malaysia, something I would have loved to say yes but just couldn't cause I wouldn't even be around. Him trusting me enough to tell me something he's kept inside, and me trying my best to be there even though I know my advice wouldn't be good enough.
All the random conversations with Asto, movies with Jing and her other workmates, shopping in Yaohan and Senado Square, learning that we both use UM1s, having dessert in TTR. I did find a great friend to keep.
Dinner with William, and mornings before he goes to work. Him insisting on giving me his special brand of kopi-o and just slacking watching tv, asking if I had enough clothes, and basically looking after everything for me in his own way.
Ah ford's day off, the whole day with him and talking nonsense, making inane comments on CCTV commentators and news standards.. how we just laugh in each other's faces whenever we hear something ridiculous from Calvin or someone else, how he makes me laugh at sibeh cock comments about Jade Dragon's uniforms and sushi and the like. It's so hard to explain how important Ah ford is to me, because he's always there in the background, over the years, and I don't even remember until I try not to forget.
Wilson and breakfast, people watching, just talking about random things and updating each other about life in general. Egg yolks with ketchup, and him insisting that I drink the milk tea with exactly two packets of sugar. Karaoke and ribena whisky, and loads of thanks for still coming out for me even though he was so tired. Wilson's explosiveness and his perfectionist nature makes him so unstable, but you know you really hope he finds peace and comfort from time to time.
Meeting Ricky in Galaxy, him ordering high tea for me, and just reuniting with him and gossiping like old times.. new customers, but same old Ricky.
I like it when people decide what I eat, when I don't even have to flip the menu open. I love it when there's someone who helps me with my luggage, and carries an umbrella for me in the rain. When someone pays for my taxi, and stops me from opening the bill. When I spill my beer because the tab got stuck and someone breaks it with a knife for me. When I don't have tissues and someone buys one and makes sure i put it in my bag. When someone calls a taxi for me and speaks to the driver in Cantonese cause I can't, and when someone talks to me like I'm important and tells me about the plans for his restaurant. I don't know if I'm being selfish cause I'm just taking in all this, and I like to think that I give something back. I try to be there to listen, and to be there to show concern in my own way. Though whatever I do, I don't think it will ever be enough to repay what they do for me.
Like Astoria said, I think I'm just tired of being not seen as a girl, as someone who doesn't need a bit of comfort and looking after from time to time. I do want flowers, and I do want someone to pat my head and tell me I need to rest. But because there's no one in sight right now I still can stand tall and say I can look after myself. That's where my pride comes in, and maybe why people misread me as well.
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velda.
